7 Categories of Cursed Objects You Can Buy From West Elm

What is a cursed object? In this case, these are objects meant to be art, but dutifully failing while following around a generation of people to remind them of their economic and aesthetic mistakes. Capitalism demands more objects with no utility be mass produced, therefore defeating the purpose of art, so have a bunch of stuff that looks as dystopian as this entire sentence!

While I am not strictly a utilitarian, there are certain decorative trends that rely on the fossil fuel industry and destruction of natural resources in ways that should haunt people when our planet has regions that are on their way to being uninhabitable to human populations.

Don’t worry, this post contains no affiliate links and is not sponsored in anyway by anyone. I’m embarrassing myself all on my own here.

1. Round Objects For Occult Purposes

In global sometimes ancient religions and superstitions on every continent there is the act of gazing through a hole, arch or other round thing. Why not bring these objects into your home to make it a nonspecific religious sacred space without the actual history and significance of any one religion?

If wood isn’t your style, you could get a marble disc instead! Made in Indonesia, these are reminiscent of Chinese Bi Discs and may subconsciously support that paleo diet you keep going for. Plus, it matches your all greige interior decorating. These will cost you $66-170 USD and aren’t even made of jade!

If you’d prefer something made of metal and wood, then the River Rock and Metal Sculptural Objects may be more of your cup of tea, especially if you like tossing objects through hoops! Made in Honduras, these rocks had metal shapes bent and then placed inside of them after a hole for the rod or loop had been created. There’s likely an adhesive helping as well, but I wouldn’t know since I haven’t seen one of these in person. These will set you back $30-70 USD depending on your choice of sculpture.

Objects with holes in the centers also come in ceramic varieties that could match your decorating taste while setting you back $40-90 USD.

Why buy something made by an artisan here in the US from a website like Etsy when you can buy this from West Elm?

2. Blood Stones

The gem stone trade is fraught with problems and under even the best conditions the earth is being damaged, sometimes in the significant places of other people. Because of this, almost all gem stones could be called blood stones due to the cost to people and planet. But don’t you want pretty shiny sparkly objects?! Yes. Don’t we all?

Petrified Wood Object On Stand

Sourced from Indonesia, this petrified wood tells a story of long forgotten ecosystems that collapsed during times of climate change, with the remaining wood fossilizing. This fossilized wood is then collected and cut by hand with no confirmation of the ethics associated with this consumable object other than the obscure label of “hand crafted.”

Perhaps you are more inclined toward paperweight style rocks.

These paperweights come in varieties such as Lemurian, Smoky Quartz, Citrine, Amethyst and Rose Quartz. Each will set you back about $50 USD for something harvested from another country under unsubstantiated claims of sustainability. As an example, the lemurian is clear quartz crystal sourced from South America (in this case, Brazil). Does this make it different from other clear quartz crystals also composed of silicon dioxide? Only in that it used extensive fossil fuels to get to the United States even though we source crystals of this same quality domestically. This means that the citrine, smoky quartz, and lemurian are all foreign sourced materials domestically produced in the United States under stricter labor law conditions. And that rose quartz? It’s sourced from “Africa” – this is the only information available. They do not provide the country of origin, only the continent, raising concerns about how ethical these sourcing claims are when, again, this is a stone that can be sourced domestically within the United States.

But what if you want “natural quartz” with no specific label sourced from another country? They have you covered! There’s an entire nondescript “natural stone on stand“product that derives quartz of a variety of colors from India. Yet again, we could source stones domestically from within the United States, but instead we are sourcing them internationally relying on fossil fuels and imports.

3. Lying Tomes

Do you want to look like you read, but can’t actually read a book? Do you want to impress people without being able to carry on a conversation about the books on your shelf? Do you want a secret set of books for pressing flowers, herbs and dollar bills? Lucky you!

Try to ingratiate yourself with others dishonestly by purchasing bundles of books you’ve never read and likely have no intention of reading! Why curate your own book collection when you can have someone else color coordinate the covers as decorative objects, completely devaluing the words inside. Good for you!

4. Sticks and Other Dead Nature

Do you like collecting sticks while outside? No? Do you like the look of a stick with all of its bark sanded off? Yes? Well I have great news for you! For a little over $50 you too can look like you enjoy nature! Why bother going outside and touching grass?

Are you more interested in something wooden and dead that shows off the damage humans can do? You’re in luck there too! Instead of learning how to use a saw, sandpaper, and lacquer to achieve the same result, you can simply buy a slice of wood.

Gaze through the hole in the center of this piece of wood or count the rings to see how old it was. Even though we have trees in the United States this has been sourced from Indonesia and they won’t even tell you what kind of wood it is. It makes one wonder if these slabs of wood are derived from Indonesia’s rainforests. So why not contribute to ecological destruction for the sake of your taste and sensibilities?

5. Scrying Orbs

Shiny or translucent glass balls are sometimes used for scrying, especially if mirror like or otherwise interesting. Are you interested in buying an orb from West Elm? Some light up, which may help those worried about eye strain while scrying. Others look more like bubbles and will let someone relive some of their favorite bubble scenes while playing and trying not to break them.

But that sheen could still be useful. And besides, if we’re already having a recycling crisis in the United States, why not import other countries’ recycled glass products instead of replicating these and making them our own? Why not waste fossil fuels when domestic companies like Glass Now (not sponsored) is already going out of their way to produce beautiful, high quality products out of recycled glass?

6. Lying Fruit

How do you feel about bananas? Do you need to add a banana to your measuring device selection, but worry about the natural processes of reality? Do you think grocery store bananas are beautiful? Do you want to duct tape one to your wall?

Guess what?! You’re in luck!

Offered in both ripe and overripe coloring, these faux fruits will set you back $45 USD each. They will not provide any food or sustenance to anyone, and given bananas can be $0.19 each, you could buy around 237 bananas that could sit on your kitchen counter until eaten, providing you with food and achieving the same aesthetic for around a year assuming you buy 1 banana at a time.

That said, if you really want to look like you have a $120,000 USD banana duct taped to your wall, this is likely an ideal solution. Plus, Pretti.Cool (not sponsored) is based domestically in Houston, Texas. If you like unique objects, I do recommend checking them out.

7. Useless Knots and Metaphorical Chains

Do you feel trapped by your life and want to surround yourself with reminders? Are you into kinky stuff? Do you want subtle reminders to threaten family members and guests? Guess what, you special lovely person – these chains and knots will only bind you financially! As an example, the Five Linked Blackened Wood Object will set you back anywhere between $100-389 USD.

Alternatively, you may prefer stone.

Setting you back only $50, if you prefer a heavy stone chain this may be for you!

But what about those knots? Well, luckily they are very fragile.

Each is made of glass and could run you as much as $150 USD. They also come in black and other colors. It’s good that these knots are easy to break if necessary, but not so great if you are hoping to have a home not full of broken glass. These glass knots are made in China and imported to the United States. Alternatively, a vintage glass knot on Etsy will put you back $50, and an artisan made one will cost around $30.

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